Been There, Done That
We are social animals and our happiness comes from those who are dear to us.
As I peeked the smiling souls on the front decorative wall on the last day of my tenure in a startup, a sense of loss and relief simultaneously slipped in my mind, without any prescience ofthe forthcoming odyssey. Pretending to be impervious to the surroundings, I somehow let myself indulge in the hit of mindfulness.
Burning with uneasiness inherent in my bones, I was taken to reflecting on the eventful chapter of my life. With much to digest, I had to readjust my objectives in my perception on startups.
In my last exposure on self-reliance, it is a point of honor that we shall be the creators and masters of ourselves. Last episode of working fantasies turned into a wishful thinking. My sheer disgust led to my wishful thinking, and everything started to fall apart. At the time, one of my roommates desperately invited me to participate his new startup. He had been a professional tennis athlete with resources in the tennis circle. Without thorough contemplation, I took it for granted that it was my biggest opportunity after graduation. Meticulous as I may be, the concept of startup and doing business was far beyond my understanding, and the only and right avenue to prove was to act right now.
In advent of national industrial reform, everything was so mesmerizing: venture capitals were hunting for the next promising seeds, a multitude of startups were eagerly pursuing their aspirations, every tennis players were rejoicing at the sight of huge prizes. As for us, we were convinced that we could make a difference with off-beaten path and enthusiasm.
The 2015 Tennis Carnival was a hit, at least in the eyes of the traditional media. We set up a fire, but it went down as we groped in the darkness and struggled without flashlights.
History would tell us that unproved fantasies only bring ridicule and dreams were just beautiful pretense for daydreamers.
Nothing was more audacious and meandering than our initiation. I was ready to stir a new wave of revolution upon my arrival, but the harsh truth stood in the way. My hands were tied when we were preoccupied with fixing bugs and drafting the first mockup. Four months had witnessed my disputes and conflicts with our outsourcing company.
Mr.Ge, as I later realized, was one of the three musketeers of outsourcing business in his company. Our stories went far beyond our social interaction. Day by day, I would summarize all the latest ideas and designs for developing, and in turn, he would deliver much-to-fix products; I would insist on the smooth procedure and user experience, and he would refute me with programming languages which failed to convince me. Our cooperation went astray as I expected. At times, I could not tolerate his imperfect solutions, and shout at him through the cellphone. I had to be honest, all of the ugly protests were the consequence of my inexperience.
As I fully devoted myself to crafting the best product I could possibly imagine, the rest of our team were formulating the business plan and marketing strategies. More often than not, a sense of misunderstanding and loneliness was all over me. As for the management, products were at the core of the ecosystem. However, their ambitions turned out to another excuse for future financing.
The first influential game was approaching and we were racking our brains for accommodating the playoffs in the game at our convenience. With some major functions unfinished, we had to conduct an online meeting for alternative solutions. Manual operation on databases was the best choice.
It was a Friday night, I sat on a chair at the balcony, listening to their discussions and disputes, and communicating with texts because my girlfriend had gone to bed early. Sleepiness had crept in and crushed my spirit as my watch indicated 3 a.m under the moonlight. So intense and competitive was our working schedule that we had to arrive the gymnasium at 8:00 a.m, which left me no more than three hours to sleep tight. My head accidentally hit the wall as I unconsciously fell to the ground.
Numb.
The next day I grabbed my clothes and dash to the destination. Fortunately, our efforts were rewarding as the first product showdown survived marketing trials.
All of these personal anecdotes taught me one lesson: wrestling with outsourcing had rendered me with patience, an indispensable trait for life, as I reflected countless exchanges with Mr.Ge.
Since then, the fire was spreading over Shanghai as well as some major cities. Our operation manager L led a series of victories in attracting clubs to be our major alliances in less than three months. Our creative moves and optimization of game management process became enthralling. The 2016 Tennis Carnival proved our competence in delivering the best performance and participation of the tennis circle.
**With brand awareness and recognition, product once again became the center of our discussion. **Before the Spring Festival, X officially went on board, and I had benefited from his innovative perception and professionalism. Gradually, our department was all the more significant than others, but the dilemma was particularly troublesome thanks to little or no assistance from the company.
At the end of August, it was a time for a perfect presence in the renowned and long-standing Shanghai Rolex Masters where superior tennis athletes as well as crazy fans would spare no efforts to earn the tickets. Since its commencement in September, our team had worked days and nights to orchestrate the best confrontations and dramatics in a tennis game. The Road to Master was appealing to every tennis participant. Frequent challenges revived the passion during 45-day qualifying contests. Only by triumphing the best players in your level could one be able to be selected in the final performance with world tennis athletes.
When I stood at the court in Qizhong Tennis Center, circumventing the stylish and magnificent environment, my heart accelerated with sincere hope that everything be all right. Luckily, our contest and a special edition of TV show deserved more attention and accolades.
To my astonishment, the climax concluded with our exhaustion and enervation.
Something I observed had finally surfaced.
Our businesses were heating up, but our ambitions were cooling down.
When everyone was curious about our next strike, the door suddenly slammed.
When the conflagration of tennis from August to October had ultimately died down, the management had declared that everyone take regular shifts to rejuvenate and stay away from the protracted battle. Our efforts were somehow compensated. However, there were clandestine financing rumors spreading around, which tickled our temptation and clouded our judgement.
One week after the crusade, we were called to attend the not-so-often-held meeting where the management highly commended our sacrifice and furthermore, hoped that everyone would return with refreshing spirit for the most crucial due diligence by several venture capitals.
At that time, I was so dumbfounded as to question the rationale and motive of their investment. **We put on a mask, and they fell on prey. **That was my logic because all the messages and strategic planning were at the mercy of the management, and I had to say, without transparent communication and effective institutions, we were like helpless lambs waiting to be salvaged.
Such turmoil had long been growing in my mind. The early confrontation began when our department minced no words in rebuking the management’s decision in independent mobile application only for cajoling less qualified investors in early April. Every move was totally dictatorial and inflexible. To my surprise, they seemed to be quite delighted in pursuing their fantasies.
It was extremely intense and something would have exploded if the decision was pushed forward without our consent. One of the impressive remarks the management had disclosed was that since they “owned” this company, so it was imperative that proposals be executed without any dissent. From my perspective, it was absolutely nonsense and would jeopardize our cause with limited resources. In the end, my friend L, founder of this company, had gone great lengths in persuading both sides to compromise and focus on the bigger picture. Sometimes, compromise was the better choice if you were the underdog. Fortunately, the management continued his developing schedule and we accentuated the prospective returns.
It was the first time that I had serious doubts about the future and what I could do to reverse the tide.
The more critical moment came when our ideal business was based on the traditional marketing and branding essential to ensure the revenues without perfect products. Never had it crossed my mind that the management was sticking to the orthodox business rather than embracing the innovative industry. Conventional wisdom enlightened me that the fundamental paradox between users and revenues always stood in the way. As it dawned on me that painstaking struggle would only result in futile endeavor, I could not help asking myself what on earth I was doing and why I had been blind to all of these tricks. At the same time, other members in the company shared my deepest concerns, but some of them ignored the brutal fact and went on idling away the most precious treasure in life.
I lamented, reflected and decided to mind my own business. Without further inquiring details, I would still do my best in mundane work, which had failed to inspire me. During the Spring Festival, I would jump at the chance to openly discuss with my dad. He tried his best to empathize with my dilemma, and the honest conversations shed some light in my aimless career.
It was time to leave behind what I had sacrificed.
My annoucement was a surprise to all, as I had expected. However, I did not regret and exchange my heart with all of them. Deep inside, I was nostalgic and sentimental. Though everything would be gone in smoke, the experiences and failures would no doubt make me stronger and even more rational down the road.
At the end of March 31st, I handed in my laptop and took the metro back to home.
After several days away from work, I was urged by my ego to speak out and write down all the lessons so as to remind myself and perhaps others who encounter similar episodes.
Here is my practical advice to those who are willing to change the world:
As for the management, ideas will never suffice, and strategy and execution are the overriding definition of the highest possibility a startup could tap.
Endless discussions, frequent schedule changes, dictatorial management will crush our morale. On the contrary, companies with consistent strategies and audacious execution will be more likely to triumph in the competitive market.
As for the team, mutual growth matters.
The worst case will be that members in a team share different perspectives but will never succumb to the other’s opinion. Blindness and feelings consume their promising career, and as a result, they will part ways and even become enemies in the future.
Mutual growth, an expression that Kelvin Kelly highlights in his popular book Out of Control, is originally intended for explaining natural dependence in biology. However, it can be also applied to social relationships because we are social animals and our happiness comes from those who are dear to us. Enterprises are encouraged to let the team be more self-reliant and cooperative.
As for the individual, lifelong learning becomes predominant in careers, especially when one is fortunate to participate the revolutionary industry in person.
When all learning is routinely accessible, there is no illusion that the world would still be the one a decade ago. Besides, the market is innovating to enable everyone to learn and earn in new ways, but it will always rest on our shoulders to carry on the torch.
Been there, done that.
As the previous chapter has come to an end, I believe my faith will always spark.